Exxon Is Really Good At Oil Spills

After all these years Exxon still hasn't learned it's lesson. Around 24 years ago the Exxon Valdez bungled the Prince William Sound in Alaska with between 257,000 to 750,000 barrels of oil after running aground.

Now the company is having trouble in Arkansas where a pipeline has broken vomiting oil all over a quiet neighborhood. Video and description below.

84,000 gallons of oil leaked nto the Central Arkansas town of Mayflower in Friday, spilling into neighborhoods. Treehugger reports, Arkansas Senator Mark Pryor was one of one the seventeen Democrats that joined all the Republican Senators in voting for symbolic approval of the Keystone XL pipeline. Pryor has claimed the pipeline will help create jobs in Arkansas, where some of the pipe is manufactured, however as Bloomberg reported recently, the project will only create 20 full time jobs, not the thousands that Pryor, TransCanada and other supporters like to talk about."

Google Laughs At Other April Fools Day Jokes With "Google Nose"

It's April Fools Day so let the lame faux news reports and celebrity death hoaxes commence. Boring. Google has decided that they are going to crush all of those lazy April Fools Day pranks with one of their own, Google Nose.

With the tag line "Smelling Is Believing" the new Beta edition offers you the chance to enjoy the smell of wet dog, car exhaust, horse manure, and spring morning.

Google NoseBETA leverages new and existing technologies to offer the sharpest olfactory experience available:

-Street Sense vehicles have inhaled and indexed millions of atmospheric miles.
-Android Ambient Odor Detection collects smells via the world's most sensible mobile operating system.
-SMELLCD™ 1.8+ high-resolution compatible for precise and controlled odors.

Jack Nicholson Frightens Jennifer Lawrence

Jack Nicholson is a legend of film. His roles are iconic and I can't think of anybody that is more imitated but never quite replicated than him. That being said, numerous ounces of alcohol can turn any legendary thespian into a sweaty, creepy, old man.

While chatting live with George Stephanopoulos about her Oscar triumph, Jack Nicholson started circling the young starlet like a bear does honey.

Nicholson: "You look like an old girlfriend."

Lawrence: "Oh, really? Do I look like a new girlfriend?"

Nicholson: "I thought about it."

Lawrence: "Oh, my God, Is he still here?"

Nicholson: "I'll be waiting!"

Lawrence: "Oh, my God. I need a rear-view mirror!"

Jack seems to have lost some bat speed but he's still swinging for the fences. What dude with a pulse in his pants wouldn't be interested in Jennifer Lawrence? I mean, he has dirty old man written all over those sunglasses, but come on Jennifer. Throw the man a bone. He's a legend.

LA TIMES

Titanic II Is Not A Good Idea

When you're an "Average Joe" like myself you have all these crazy ideas that you don't have the means to achieve. When you're an Australian billionaire all your wildest ideas can come true, even if they are really stupid.

Clive Palmer, said Australian billionaire, revealed his plans for Titanic II. A bigger than full scale recreation of that famous ship that failed and sunk. You know, the one that James Cameron made famous. Showing off some blueprints this maniac then said he might have to build a Titanic III if this pans out.

If this pans out? You're building a sequel to the biggest maritime disaster of all time, I don't like your chances eccentric billionaire. It doesn't help that this ship isn't going to have any televisions or internet capability. Sop living in the past.

How are you going to market this venture?

"Titanic II: This Time We'll Make It"

"Titanic II: When Sinking Is Not An Option"

I do think James Cameron is really excited about it, he now knows what his next project is going to be after Avatar 2 & 3.

USA TODAY

Old Navy "Airplane!" Inspired Commercial Featuring Julie Hagerty

Old Navy is killing it with this fairly recent run of commercials featuring pop culture icons. We've seen everybody from Luke Perry as Dylan McKay to Chevy Chase as Clark W. Griswold. The latest pop culture slap in the face comes courtesy of actress Julie Hagerty of Airplane! fame.

The commercial features Hagerty hamming it up for the camera in as a stewardess in an airplane selling the hell out of some jeans.

Meteorite Injures Over 1,000 People In Russia

While the world was bracing for a giant asteroid, with the boring name of 2012 DA14 to buzz by our planet, a meteorite caused havoc in the Russian Urals region. The meteorite has been estimated to weigh around 10 tons and cut through the earth's atmosphere going 33,000 mph where it split into pieces anywhere between 18-32 miles above the Earth's surface.

Scientists are reporting that the meteorite which caused damage to 3,000 plus buildings in the city to be unrelated to Asteroid 2012 DA14, which I am going to call Bruce Willis, and was only 17,150 miles from our planet at one point. I find that a little too coincidental, but what do I know, I'm not a scientist. Check out some videos below.

YAHOO

Woman's Cause Of Death: Coca Cola

In 2010, 30 year old Natasha Harris of New Zealand passed away from what was determined to be a fatal arrythmia. Medical examiners connected her death to the large quantity of Coca-Cola the woman would consume per day, an insane 2.2 Gallosn

What? What are you doing? Why would anybody drink that much soda, let alone that much anything per day? That comes out to 22 plus cans of Coke a day.

Now the coroner is recommending that Coca Cola put a warner on their labels. What's it going to say, "Don't drink two 12 packs of Coke per day, you might die."? IF you drank 2.2 gallons of anything per day, it's most likely not a good idea. Just be an adult and drink a can of soda instead of pointing fingers.

USA TODAY

People Are Awesome 2013: A Video Of Awesome Things

I guess the guy who posted this also got eleventeen million hits on some other video he posted, but I don't really care about any of that. I care about the video below, a bunch of people doing awesome things. People jumping, people gliding, people throwing, people catching. It's American as apple pie but with worldwide appeal.

Biggest Boss Move Of 2013: Student Comes Out At Award Ceremony

You got to hand it to this kid, balls of steel. Jacob Rudolph riled 300 plus classmates into a standing ovation when he came out during an award ceremony in Parsippany, N.J. The below speech was fitting since he was being presented the "Class Actor Award". The kid's father was so damn proud he uploaded the video himself.

"Sure I've been in a few plays and musicals, but more importantly, I've been acting every single day of my life. You see, I've been acting as someone i'm not. Most of you see me every day. You see me acting the part of "straight" Jacob, when I am in fact LGBT. Unlike millions of other LGBT teens who have had to act every day to avoid verbal harassment and physical violence, I'm not going to do it anymore. It's time to end the hate in our society and accept the people for who they are regardless of their sex, race, orientation, or whatever else may be holding back love and friendship. So take me, leave me, or move me out of the way. Because I am what I am, and that's how I'm going to act from now on."

Internet Complains About Mercedes' Kate Upton Super Bowl Commercial

Apparently there is a select group of the internet that hates hot women. According to Yahoo Shine bloggers are complaining about a new Mercedes commercial that shows Kate Upton enticing men to wash her car while a blues riff blares in the background. What bloggers are complaining about this? You're either un-American or jealous. I wonder what it's like to hate fun?

I think Mercedes is playing this the right way. They are obviously presenting this in a tongue and cheek manner, and by getting behind the hottest woman in the world attempting to change the demographics of their brand. Maybe they don't want blue hairs who spend half their time in Florida being the only ones who buy their cars. You'll certainly cover the entire male demo, and what female wouldn't want to be Kate Upton? I sure want them to.

Video below, or you can wait until February 3rd when it airs during the Super Bowl.