Rob Zombie to Remake The Blob
Fri, August 28, 2009 
I tend to follow the "Siskel & Ebert Code" when it comes to film criticism - specifically Rule #1: "See the movie."
It's with that I can't truthfully tell you that Rob Zombie's Halloween remake from 2007 was ass. But if it looks like a turd and smells like a turd, there's a 99.9999999% chance that it is in fact a turd. So there are those rare exceptions. Despite initial interest in his take on the Shape, I refused to waste $8 (and more importantly 2 hours of my life) on Halloween as well as its just-released sequel.
Zombie has his sights set on another "old-school" horror film that will get the trademark "killer redneck" treatment. As per Variety, the Devil's Rejects director is prepping to remake The Blob while he writes the script on tour this fall with a $30 million budget at his disposal.
Now I could bitch about some of his retarded comments in the trades including the gem that The Blob isn't in the horror genre but science fiction because its about "a thing from outer space." I guess that means Carpenter's The Thing isn't a horror film then. Huh. No, this quote stood out:
"That gigantic Jello-looking thing might have been scary to audiences in the 1950s, but people would laugh now. I have a totally different take, one that’s pretty dark."
I guess he missed the 1988 Chuck Russell/Frank Darabont remake. What stands out for everyone in that one is Paul McCrane (he's the bad-guy who got splattered by Kurtwood "Bitches Leave" Smith's car in Robocop) being split into two by the blob. Now come on, Zombie. That was pretty fucking scary.
Reader Comments (1)
I enjoyed the first remake of "The Blob" more than the original, but if they put hack Zombie in the director's chair then I'm just gonna freakin skip it.